Scaling the Wall

I think, to this point, my life has been relatively easy. It doesn't always feel that way - in fact, sometimes when I'm facing a particularly high wall on this obstacle course of daily life, I can't imagine that I'll ever be past that wall. I stare up at the wall already feeling defeated. I refuse to consider the previous walls that  have been conquered with God's strength, and label it impossible. I turn my back on the wall instead of calling out to God for help. I lose myself on the internet, wasting another afternoon. And, far too quickly, the weeks follow the days down the drain, and not only am I no closer to scaling that wall, but I'm getting even more comfortable in my own static existence. 


What to do?


I try to remind myself of a few things when I reach such a point. I remind myself that God is my source of strength. I think Philippians 4:13 was the first verse I memorized when I was little (had to be either Awana or the Donut Man...). That verse is often referenced when facing difficult circumstances, and even when facing things that are seemingly trivial. I've even seen it used in battling the urge to bite your nails. So, broad applicability? Certainly. Encouraging? Definitely. But, the other day my pastor preached from chapter four, and preceding that famous verse thirteen are some equally powerful words. Beginning in verse four, Paul writes,

Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. ⁵Let your reasonableness be known to everyone.The Lord is at hand; ⁶do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. ⁷And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

As I face (or run away from) that wall, the wall that is an endless source of frustration and stress, am I still remembering to rejoice? Or am I letting anxiety creep into a life that has been bought at high price? This is what I've been meditating on lately.

So, this week, I'm no longer ignoring the wall. But even though I'm facing it knowing that God is my source of strength, the wall doesn't look any smaller. From my perspective, it still looks scary. Threatening. Insurmountable. The external circumstances remain the same. If not this obstacle, then another. What has changed (or rather, is changing) is my internal condition. These verses are a reminder that my focus is to be on rejoicing in the Lord, not on anxiety over obstacles that are comparably minuscule. Rather, my role is to rejoice and present my requests with thanksgiving. Then, when that wall is scaled with God's strength, it will not be for my own personal sense of satisfaction. It will be scaled so that I may, in some small way, bring glory to God.  

Gloria in exelsis deo.